John Gaccione

Date: 10/09/2020

Subject: What You Don’t Know Can Hurt You Scheme

From: Headquarters

Recently our campaign gurus have concluded our two candidates have stalled, one is overloaded with old baggage and the other is light on qualifications and experience. We desperately need to dial up our campaign opposing the two incumbent KPPCSD Board candidates. 

A sure-fire way to deflect attention away from our problems is by resurrecting the fears of annexation. As we know, the dreaded El Cerrito’s only goal in life is annexing our affluent independent hillside sovereign village of Kensington. Yee-haw!

The scheme’s code name: Lost Cat. [The title of What You Don’t Know Can Hurt You flyer.]

The idea is to paint an image of a defenseless unincorporated area located within the dreaded El Cerrito’s sphere of influence getting the green light from a hapless LAFCO bureaucracy to gobble up our Kensington. And it can happen before you know it! 

El Cerrito would be able to solve their financial problems with access to our reserves, considerable tax base and a few modest demands for service. And before you can say “Put Kensington First” the Kensington we know and love would cease to exist. 

Outsourcing our independent police department is the first sign of the approaching apocalypse. It is imperative we connect the two incumbent candidates with supporting outsourcing and imply they are in favor of annexation. And we know where annexation leads to!

Remember, it always helps to take the stance of being a victim. Promote the idea the cards are stacked against us, and self-determination along with local control will always be thrown under the bus by a hapless bureaucracy. 

In time the scheme may be exposed as the falsehood it is, but it just has to get us to the election. Besides, what you don’t know can hurt you. Is that a disservice?

“It is difficult to say what truth is, but sometimes it is so easy to recognize a falsehood.”

(Albert Einstein)

Caution: May not be suitable for all audiences. You might have already won.