Stymied? / Memo to the 370 Club Faithful
John Gaccione
11/23/19
Subject: The Big Win
From: The Executive Steering Committee
Chalk up a big win! The ordinance designed to prevent outsourced police services of our local boutique independent police department has saved the day. Poison pill… you bet.
Last week the El Cerrito Chief of Police made a presentation to the El Cerrito City Council about a contracting agreement proposal with the KPPCSD. A cadre of the faithful attended the meeting to voice their opposition to outsource our police services for Kensington.
The faithful had to endure being last on the ECCC’s agenda before they could speak and make their case for keeping the KPD independent. Many speakers give El Cerrito a sample of the faithful’s core values, freely bashing the current KPPCSD Board along with expressing their complete disdain for the notion of outsourcing.
All the usual boilerplate arguments against outsourcing were voiced. Polls showed Kensington was the safest corner of the known universe. Outsourcing would lower property values. The 370 responses to a recent mailing of 1200 about outsourcing police services. There is no cost saving with outsourcing. Worst yet, Kensingtonians would cede control of their village to the megalopolis of the dreaded El Cerrito. Have mercy!
After a round of discussions the ECCC declined to offer a proposal in response to Kensington’s RFP. The ECCC indicated it has no current interest in moving forward with the RFP until Kensington has resolved its ordinance’s legal issues. They instructed ECPD Chief Keith to respond to the KPPCSD with a letter stating El Cerrito is not interested at this time.
The faithful prefer their private police department just the way it is, warts and all. Gosh, if the police department were outsourced who would drive Kensingtonians around to look for their lost dogs? It is just such an outrage!
While some would advise humor and kindness are the antidotes for much of what ails us, the faithful know it requires guile and misinformation to finish the job. It’s so simple, outsourcing/contracting = annexation. End of story.
“Nothing is more destructive of respect for the government and the law of the land than passing laws which cannot be enforced.” (Albert Einstein)
Keeping K-burg hamstrung with quasi-legal misrepresented ordinances.
Note: All or part of the above post may have lapsed into the realm of satire.